Journey….

Posted: February 21, 2011 in Uncategorized

In the past month that I have been injured and unable to run, it has allowed much time to think and analyze. Here are some things that have been floating around my head in terms of being active:

Could I possibly just get up everyday and do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want? Could I do it without a training plan, a schedule, or planned out mileage? Without the external validation of being told I am hard-core, or a bad-ass? Just be active because I like it, because it feels good? Just run because it makes me high and clears my head, instead of having to in order to finish (enter crazy race of the month)?

Pushing beyond one’s comfort zone is a useful tool and can be very healthy.  But when is it not?  Signing up and training for races can be fun and social.  But is it sometimes too much?

Truth is, folks, I have mastered the art of the push. I have been told I am a bad-ass for a long time. I have raced, trained, pushed through, and even taught others how to do the same. I think it is time this journey of mine take a different path. The one of finding and listening to what I really enjoy and doing just that, for as long as I enjoy it and then doing something else.

I have a new trust in myself that I don’t need to be held accountable by schedules and plans and other people to stay active. It has become a part of me, like my right arm.  And it will always be a part of me. And it can grow and change and morph and flourish….Does anyone else have a visual of me with a crazy octopus-looking right arm??!

Fly and be free, people!!

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Comments
  1. Heidi says:

    This post spoke to me! My identity was wrapped up for many years in being the GO-GO-GO black belt, kickboxing, boot-camping instructor and workout master.

    Then, I became injured and life forced me to have a look at all of that identity ego-stuff.

    In the end, we don’t have to prove anything to anyone. And what I’ve found is that when I remove the external goals and stop working build the ego with accolades from others, I still stay active, I still can kick ass, but I enjoy it a WHOLE lot more now. And, there’s more space to think, rest and contemplate as a result. This adds a depth you cannot achieve when you are constantly DOING.

    I wholeheartedly support your efforts to look at your physical expenditures from a new perspective. I believe you will get much more pleasure out of life this way.

    Heidi

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